Revenge of the Telemarketer (Australian version)

[Dynamiks]

Revenge on the Telemarketer

Three Little Words That Work!!

1) The three little words: "Hold On, Please..."
Saying this, while putting down your phone and walking off instead of
hanging-up immediately would
make each telemarketing call so much more time-consuming, that boiler
room sales would grind to a halt.

Then when you eventually hear the Telstra's "beep-beep-beep" tone, you
know it's time to go back and
hang up your handset, which has efficiently completed its task. These
three little words will help eliminate
telephone soliciting.

2) Do you ever get those annoying phone calls with no one on the other
end?

This is a telemarketing technique where a machine makes phone calls and
records the time of day when a
person answers the phone. This technique is used to determine the best
time of day for a ?"real"? salesperson
to call back and get someone at home. What you can do after answering,
if you notice there is no one there,
is to immediately start hitting your # button on the phone, 6 or 7
times, as quickly as possible. This confuses
the machine that dialled the call and it kicks your number out of their
system.

Gosh, what a shame not to have your name in their system any longer!!!

3) When you get those "pre-approved" letters in the mail for everything
from credit cards to 2nd mortgages
and similar type junk, do not throw away the return envelope. Most of
these come with postage-prepaid return
envelopes, right? It costs them more than the regular 50 cents postage
"IF" and when they receive them back.
It costs them nothing if you throw them away! In that case, why not get
rid of some of your other junk mail
and put it in these cool little postage-prepaid return envelopes?

...Send an ad for an ANZ credit card to American Express. Send a pizza
coupon to Westpac.
...If you didn't get anything else that day, then just send them their
blank application back!
...If you want to remain anonymous, just make sure your name isn't on
anything you send them.
...You can even send the envelope back empty if you want to just to
keep them guessing! It still costs them $1.00.

The banks and credit card companies are currently getting a lot of
their own junk back in the mail, but folks, we
need to OVERWHELM them.

Let's let them know what it's like to get lots of junk mail, & best of
all they're paying for it... Twice!

Let's help keep Australia Post busy since they are saying that e-mail
is cutting into their business profits, and
that's why they need to increase postage costs again.

You get the idea!
If enough people follow these tips, it will work ----maybe you'll get
very little junk mail in future.

[Jenibell]

I have done the thrid one

thats freaking funny as hell

and also for telamaketers ask them 100 questions about what they are trying to sale I had a telamaketer hang up on me.... haha

[Firia]

I, thankfully, get none of the above. But we used to get barraged by telemarketers at my old number.

I liked messing with the telemarketers. Pretending to be an old lady with missing medication. Act like I was calling them and trying to sell them something. Trying to convert them to some religion (typically Jehovas whitness ).

But when I move again, I shall keep these techniques in mind.

[Coltess]

Oh that too is funny!

[ivanelme]

"<wolf> 1. Save every Free Credit Card Offer you get, Put it in pile A
<wolf> 2. Save every Free Coupon You get, put that in pile B
<wolf> 3. Now open the credit card mail from pile A and find the Business
Reply Mail Envelope.
<wolf> 4. Take the coupons from pile B and stuff them in the envelope you hold
in your hand.
<wolf> 5. Drop the stuffed to the brim envelopes in your mail and walk away
whistling.
<wolf> I have now received two phone calls from the credit card companies
telling me that they received a stuffed envelope with coupons rather
then my application. They informed me that it they are not pleased that
they footed the bill for the crap I sent them. I reply with "It says
Business Reply Mail" I'm suggesting coupons to you to ensure that your
business is more successful. They promptly hang up on me.
<wolf> Now, I did this for about a month before it got boring, so I got an
added idea! I added exactly 33 cents worth of pennies to the envelope
so they paid EXTRA due to the weight. I got a call informing me about
the money, I said it was a mistake and I demanded my change back. After
yelling at the clerk and then to the supervisor they agreed to my
demands and cut me a check for the money. I hold in my hand at this
very moment a check from GTE Visa for exactly 33 cents."

Taken from www.bash.org