Fun stuff with english

[Mivat]

When people tries to speak english, their meanings often get a bit...twisted. Mostly due to their lack of knowledge about the language, but also due to commons mistakes and mixing of words. Here are some examples.

«I am in the beginning of my period...»
(newly appointed female danish minister)
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«I am a man who likes to have my balls in the air.»
(Swedish businessman)
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«Thank you for the mess»
(Norwegian Prime Minister Kjell Magne Bondevik after attending a Mass in Brazil )
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«I just want to lie down on the coach»
(Tired swedish female football-player)
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«But didn't you have pigs in your decks?»
(Norwegian anchorman during a discussion with an american about spiked tires. Norwegian word for spike is Pigg. Tire = Dekk)
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«I thank you for giving my wife and me the clap. I thank you from the heart of my bottom.»
(French-Canadian politician after recieving standing ovations)
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«In case of emergency, the lifeguard are under the seat.»
(Sign on a ferry, Puerto Rico)
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«We take your bags and send them in all directions.»
(Danish Airline)
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«Dear friends, we are the same as before, although we have lost our pricks.»
(When the swedish bank "Götabanken" became "Gota Bank". They referred to the ¨s above the o)
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«Excuse me, what is the fart limit?»
(Swedish driver being stopped by british police. Swedish word for speed is fart)
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A scandinavian Au-pair in the US did this little one:
Father in the house: «Do you want to use the rest room before we drive cross State?»

Au pair: «No, i can do it in the car.»
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Blunders on CV's:

Proven ability to track down and correct erors.

Spesial skills: Thyping.

I speak English floatingly.

I am skilled in proolreading.

I'm a rabid typist.

I have an obsession for detail. I like to make sure that i cross my i's and not my t's.

Left my job to ruin my family business.

I am experienced in private relations.

Received a plague for Salesperson of the Year.

[Sharle]

LOL

[Oddysee]

Omfg! That was great! I think you need to know a bit of scandinavian to get a few of them tho'... They're things that make perfect sense in our language... But I never thought I'd see 'em like that hehe...




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