Having a DJ is a wonderful experience, that all should have!
And now, YOU can too, with these simple 5 steps, you can learn to care for your DJ, in a responsible yet fun way!
Step 1:
Always walk your DJ at least 2 times a day, your local disco or nightclub are ideal locations, and should you come by a private party, don't be shy to introduce your DJ to the neighbourhood gang. A happy DJ is a healthy DJ so let it jam with the others from time to time.
Step 2:
Never, and this cannot be said clearly enough, NEVER feed your DJ after midnight. This will result in strange behaviour, and what we like to call,
Quantom Dooomage.
Step 3:
Always encourage your DJ to play new songs, but remember to scould them if they choose Britney Spears, or The Backstreet Boys. Although you should never hit your DJ, threatening them with taking away their internet connection, and shouting
"Bad DJ... BAD DJ!" always seems to do the trick, and very few DJ's make that mistake more than once.
Step 4:
Remember to clean your DJ after each session
(this is especially true if you fed them after midnight) as DJ's have a tendancy to sweat inbetween all that playing and shouting, and usually drink to much and pass out at the end of the session, thus forgettin to bathe.
Step 5:
And finally always have large quanteties of booze standing about, as you never know what fun your little DJ might get itself into after finding a bottle of vodka and going online... Keep a codak camera ready for these special, and treasurable occasions, as they will likely be the theme of family amusement at future reunions.
And there you have it, with these 5 simple steps, YOU too can have and care for, your
VERY OWN DJ!
For more information, call now at:
0800-
555-
DJ-
Direct.
Tm