A good Irishman, John O'Reilly, met regularly with his toastmasters club.
One evening they were hitting the Guinness Stout and having a contest as to
who could make the best toast.
John O'Reilly hoisted his beer and said, "Here's to spending the rest of me
life, Between the legs of me wife!"
That won him top prize for the best toast of the night.
He went home and told his wife, Mary, he won the prize for the best toast
of the night."
She said, "Aye, and what was your toast?"
John replied, "Here's to spending the rest of me life, sitting in church
beside me wife!"
Oh, that is very nice indeed, John!" Mary said.
The next day Mary ran into one of John's toasting buddies on the street
corner. The man chuckled leeringly and said, "Did you know that John won
the prize the other night with a toast about you, Mary?"
She said, "Aye, and I was a bit surprised myself. You know, he's only been
there twice! Once he fell asleep and the other time I had to pull him by
the ears to make him come!"