GridStream Productions

An old man was sitting on a bench at the mall.
A teenager walked up to the bench and sat down.
He had spiked hair in all different colors:
green, red, orange, blue, and yellow.
The old man just stared.
Every time the teenager looked, the old man was staring.
The teenager finally said sarcastically,
"What's the matter old timer,
never done anything wild in your life?"
Without batting an eye, the old man replied.....
"Got drunk once and had sex with a peacock.........
I was wondering if you were my son."

A Good Wife

John wakes up after the annual office Christmas party with a splitting headache and cotton-mouth, and is unable to recall the events of the preceding evening.
After going to the bathroom, he makes his way downstairs, where his wife puts a cup of coffee in front of him.
"Louise," he moans, "tell me what happened last night. Was it as bad as I think?"
"Even worse," she says, her voice oozing scorn. "You made a complete ass of yourself. You antagonized the entire board of directors and insulted the president of the company, right to his face."
"He's an idiot," John says. "Piss on him."
"You did," she replies, "and he fired you."
"Well, screw him!" John says.
"I did," she replies. "You're back at work on Monday."